Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Just Friends

There is a sweet, wonderful, successful man who would give you everything you’ve ever wanted in a relationship. He adores you, appreciates you for who you are, he would give anything to have a chance to be with you. He would never break your heart because he wants to give you the world. BUT…you don’t feel the same way. You know he is a great guy and enjoy spending time with him, but for whatever reason, you don’t see him as anything more than a friend.

Can any of you relate to this? Silly me…of course you can. We’ve all been there at one time or another. Doesn’t this make you crazy?

Wouldn’t life be a whole lot easier if we could simply give these relationships a chance…convince ourselves that we feel the same way and live happily ever after? Instead, we continue to hold onto people who don’t deserve us, feel things for those who aren’t available and fall for the ones who don’t fall for us.

It’s never easy falling for someone who doesn’t fall back, but it’s not any easier being on the other end. I’ve experienced both and both are equally frustrating.

I think it drives my family and friends a little crazy to see me go through the ups and downs of dating, but then not give someone a chance who would actually be really good for me. Trust me, it drives me crazy, too. Unfortunately, all we can do is follow our hearts. If we know deep down that we don’t reciprocate feelings for someone, we have to trust that instinct. Will things change down the road? Maybe. Perhaps one day we might look at this person in a different light. Or maybe we won’t.

Why the rant? I’ve mentioned him before, but My Sister’s Ex and I have become good friends and I’m really glad for that. While I’ve never gotten to a point where I could see a romantic relationship between us, he is someone I want to feel that for. Last week we went out for a few drinks to catch up and chat. I’ve had a lot on my mind and he’s dating a few people so we had a lot to talk about. He’s having a hard time committing to anyone he’s seeing. I tried to give him advice on how to figure out who he wanted to be with and I caught him up on my life. We had a really good night full of great conversation. When I got home, I got a message from him saying, “For what it’s worth, you are the girl I would drop everyone for. And I’ll leave it at that.”

So yes, that has me thinking about this dating conundrum. Have you ever fallen for someone you originally saw as just a friend?

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